Figments of the Single Gal Imagination

Well,  our trip to Vegas is basically here.  The Housewife and I leave on Friday! {gasp!}

The Housewife is clearly not in the same mental position I am in because she already has two 26.2's in the bag {what a beotch}.  I have really been super stressed this last week or so.  I am trying to squeeze in the appropriate amount of workouts so that I will be well rested but enough to feel energized when I get to the big day.  Last week I really wimped out with Thanksgiving visits, cooking, cleaning, etc. so I never really was able to squeeze in much gym time. 

I have been trying to get some really good mental images in my head to help me think positively but this week I am also trying to reflect on my journey and other things I have learned (don't worry--no more pictures of me in tiny shorts, I promise). 

{other things I have learned}  

Don't ever say this to yourself or you might not make it through all the training: 

"Oh, I will train for a marathon...then I will look like that chick in the Victoria's Secret catalogue!" or "In 5 months I will straight up look like that bitch Giselle. Eat your heart out Tom Brady -- you could have been with me instead!" 

{mental image of what you may look like after you marathon train}

And...in reality, you just look the same if you are me. Sure, you changed your insides. I can outrun people. I can climb more stairs than most without fatiguing. Blah, blah, blah. Every once in a while I can eat a whole pizza if I want when I run 20 miles.  I may have lost 1 pound.  ONE.  My hair didn't even fuller and thicker either. Lame.  

{BUT...}

I have had the best time with The Housewife these last few months!  People always ask how we are able to run for 3 1/2 hours on our long run days,  but we just hit the road and talk each other to death like any normal day or outing.  On really good days, sometimes we barely even notice we are running.  You can do anything with your best friend beside you supporting you and loving you the whole way through and that is an incredibly rewarding experience even if you don't get your Victoria's Secret angel wings. 

There is no way I could have done this without The Housewife. She is the master of discipline and the best training partner this Single Gal could ever ask for.  And, I think she is even a little surprised that I made it this far.  (Ok, let's be honest...I am surprised, too.)  

Hope y'all are having an inspirational week and gearing up for some new goals in 2012! I am not sure how I will top this one but I sure am going to try next year. 

Love you. Mean it. 

~the single gal~

Life Lesson #345: Pay Attention When Ordering Online or You'll Look Like an Ass

This is seriously as close as I will probably ever get to starring in a porno. I invite you to the mini-documentary of part of the Marathon Outfit.  

{A sunny October Monday...}

Single Gal: I am ordering my Race Ready shorts today. What size are yours? 

Housewife: Medium. 

Single Gal: Thanks! Mine are now on the way!  

{A few days later...}

Single Gal: I am holding these shorts up that just came in the mail and they look really small. Are you sure yours are a medium? 

Housewife: Yes.  I just went and checked mine. 

Single Gal: Well, ok.  I guess mine will be fine then.  

---------------

So, I try on these shorts.  They. Are. Outrageous.  And, they really don't look like the ones The Housewife usually wears.  Basically, my ass is hanging out.  But it's kinda too late to send them back and they fit in the waist so I figure I will just deal.  

 (Please keep in mind I have shelved my dignity for your entertainment this week.)

I know what you are thinking -- "Single Gal--those really aren't that bad.  Why are you freaking out?"

Why am I freaking out? Let's just think about this photo.  This is how exposed I am when I am not moving at all.  Just me being still.  In tiny shorts. 

And just for extra emphasis -- That. Is. My. Ass. Hanging. Out. Of. My. Shorts.  They really, really, really don't look like the Race Ready shorts that The Housewife has. 

{Flash Forward -- Our Saturday Run}

Single Gal: Housewife, my shorts seriously don't look like yours! WTH?! 

Housewife: Ooohhhh! You got the Kenyan kind!

Single Gal: I take it yours are not the Kenyan kind? 

Housewife: No. 

{And, end scene.}

Sars for my dirty, streaked mirror in those photos.  Life has been busy lately--I haven't even had time to prep any other Vegas outfits.  I guess if I get in a bind, I can throw these shorts on with some heels and gain entry into any club I want with no problems...

Oh. and I am also sorry if this post has emotionally scarred you for life. 

Love you. Mean it. 

~the single gal~

Whoa Baby(Lock)!

Christmas came early at the Housewife household this year! Well, for the Housewife at least. I have really been down since I took my sewing machine to the repair man and he did not deliver the best news. There was no point in repairing her. (Sigh.) So bless the Turtle he told me I could go ahead and get a sewing machine. He must have been tired of seeing me have the sads. In the world of sewing many of the machines go on sale in the fall because they are trying to make room for the new models. So I took #1 over to K-Woww's one day and ran some errands and was able to stop by the sewing place where a sweet old lady helped me find a machine. I introduce you to my BabyLock Grace........

Nickname: Stitch

She is a computerized baby and I love her. She is certainly not the top of the line but she is the middle of the pack. The great thing about where I purchased Stitch from is that if I decide to upgrade next year for any reason they will give me a credit for my trade in. It's very similar to car dealings. Who knew? Unfortunately for the Turtle I will now be unstoppable in my desire to buy patterns and fabric. I will get #1 in some things so you can see that I have some sewing skills. Well, at least some skills for someone who never took Home Ec and has mostly self-taught herself ("taught" equals experimenting and praying I don't make too huge of a mistake).

I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Previews and More Random Musings

I promise we will be blogging some more this week! I had big plans for the weekend for catching up on lots of stuff -- a long chat with The Housewife, long run, errands, housework, craft projects, blog (!) etc. -- but I couldn't get to all of my "To Do" items. 

So...I thought I would just give a sneak peak for some upcoming posts. I am sure you are just dying to see what will come next.   I truly have good intentions every evening to sit down and write the blog I have in my head but I plop into bed with my laptop only to log onto Pinterest and lose 1 hour of my life or more. 

 {Upcoming!}

-Great things about being "single". I know I joke and talk about finding "the one" a lot but if you have been reading the other parts of our blog I obviously have a full, happy life filled with other stuff.  It's time to remind the general public of the good life. 

-Pinterest Inspirations and recent small home projects

-You can also expect a few more Marathon themed posts in the next few weeks.  I am so consumed by this and also tired of training that I realized today I haven't even stalked great restaurants try or started imaging what I will wear while I am out in Vegas! It's shameful, really. 

-I am sure we will squeeze a Thanksgiving moment or two in as well.  

Also, Friday night I randomly started watching Pride and Prejudice and forgot how beautiful some of the moments are for this remake...sigh. Don't you just love these two? And the quotes. Gorg. 

"You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you." 

Jane Austen 

Ok, thanks for checking in and reading my lame post. 

Love you. Mean it. 

~Tired and Lazy Single Gal~

Thursday Musings on Man-Pillows

Sometimes when I am cruising the "world wide web" there are images I come across that  immediately make quite an impression on my soul.  While many on Pinterest found this image to be quite humorous I wondered when I saw it for myself if I was staring into my not-so-distant future. 

Looks fairly harmless and easy to use, right?

Except even Headless Pillow Guy appears to be coping a feel...

I will obviously need to find some brothers/sisters for Hogan before I resort to buying stuffed man-pillows.  Nonetheless, I guess both options are significantly less frightening than going back to online dating.   

Then again...

Large Stuffed Man Pillow -- $20 on overstock.com

No backtalk or heartache -- priceless. 

Thanks for reading my random Thursday musings. 

~the single gal~