Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Bad Hair Cuts, a plum and a hotel.

Sorry to keep our tried and true followers waiting this month. It's been a little hectic around The Housewife household. This post is really a lot of random things put into one blog post so that you too can learn some valuable life lessons and some "do's and don'ts".

Lesson #241: Always over-clarify with your hair dresser when moving forward with any major change to your hair. You cannot glue that shit back to your head. Well, I'm sure you could but you would look even worse than you do with the bad hair cut. I requested more of a shoulder length bob only to get a very short bob. I think I'm still depressed. I told the Single Gal I looked like this minus the bangs (even though she disagrees):

On to the plum. Even if your house is not that large once your child is mobile it is possible to lose them for a half minute while you go into the kitchen that is off of your living room in which said child is in, get a plum out of the fridge and rinse it and only to walk back into living room and ---Wham..........vanishing baby act.  Note to self: plums = losing the baby.

Road Tripping with a Baby 101:
There's really nothing good to say about this. Clearly we could have done better. #1 was not necessarily a bad traveler but naps were few and far between on the 5.5 hour ride. We even stopped for 45 minutes at a Cracker Barrel for lunch. Early bedtime was rocky but eventually there was sleep the first night. Then at 1:30 she wakes up.  This results in the Turtle coming back in the room to whisper-yell at me that he needs "help" with a dirty diaper. Fine. Get up, help with diaper and try to sway #1 back to sleep. Long story short nothing worked and we were all up from 1:30-4:30 am.  We finally sleep from 4:30-6:40.

Then from Charleston we went to Hilton Head for our friends vow renewal ceremony.  Also, we have to be back at home the next day because my cousin was getting married at 6 pm. So back from the vow renewals we came. We actually got #1 into a pretty deep sleep but decided that we should just drive back during the night. We were only in the hotel for a few hours. We used that hotel room like a hooker. Got back in record time and not a peep out of #1. Now that was some hooker success.

And as a shout out to our friend Little A who will be wedding dress shopping soon I watched some odd things on Say Yes To the Dress today. Don't bring your crazy twin brothers who want you to wear something borderline where people would call slutty bride. I mean, good thing you don't have crazy twin brothers just twin best friends. Also, do not bring an extremely large black and white cardboard cut out of M to the bridal salon with you. And above all, do not talk to said large cardboard cut out of M if you did bring one.

I give you "Silent Bob":

She looks like she is showing Silent Bob some photos of selected dresses here. #odd

Love to All,
The Housewife

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