Sunday, March 6, 2011

Mrs. Bag Lady

How quickly things change and instead of a shack bag like the single gal, I have moved on to the diaper bag. This is a very important bag (as is the shack bag) and they have some surprisingly similar items. I'm great at packing a diaper bag.... the only problem is when I'm at home and need something I "occasionally" remove it from the diaper bag. (Lesson #243- don't remove stuff from the diaper bag because it won't be there next time you run out of the door.)

First up, a change of clothes. The "spare outfit." I actually encountered this today toting #1 into the gym with me, thinking we're all hot shit because she's so darn cute we're practically skipping down the hall to the locker room with glee. Then I discover she's clearly done her business in the car on the way over and it's there for the whole world to see because it's now all over her outfit- coming out of the sides and in the front. So much for trying to be Stepford.

I won't bore you with the standard necessities we all know you need; diapers, wipes, pacifier, Desitin, burp cloth/bib and toys. These are the equivalent of having to pack your makeup bag, blow dryer, lotion, shampoo/conditioner, and possibly a curling iron.

Size does matter. Do you know why? On top of having to make sure I'm out the door with #1's bag of McGuyver items, I also have to include things for the Turtle--namely snacks. The Turtle is strangely like the Hulk and turns into this ugly green monster once he's past a certain point and his "blood sugar is low." (I call BS on that one.) Nonetheless as the mother and wife I have to be prepared for Armageddon once we've left the safe confines of the household. I won't even get into the song-and-dance which involves finding the Turtle's wallet, sunglasses or car keys.

If you need me I'll be running around finding everything I took out of the diaper bag, Turtle's sunglasses, car keys and wallet. Good thing at least one of us puts everything in the same place. 

The Housewife

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