Wednesday, May 8, 2013

No Napping Crazies.

I bet you think this post is about two tiny people who won't nap. WRONG. #1 has basically been on a nap strike for 20-something days and let me tell you......she still needs a nap. This is my excuse for a lack of blog posts although I'm sure you like the Single Gal's exciting life way better than mine. In this house we basically need a lot of patience and Jesus. From 4 in the afternoon to 6 in the evening we are ripe with meltdowns and cries for Daddy. So while Jesus is always around sometimes my patience appears to have runaway to a far off land. This is the deal. #1 has been potty trained for at least 6 months but when I put her down for a nap (we are still in pull-ups for nap/nighttime) or her "quiet time" as we now term it, she basically poops and therefor won't nap. Every.damn.day. I have even gone back in 10 minutes after leaving to change her, put her back in bed and she still finds a way to poop some more. I cannot even explain the rage living inside my head. RAGE.

I don't really see it as a serious regression because she has no problems in public or when she is with a grandparent. This golden behavior is only reserved for nap time. I will also be the first to tell you that "quiet time" is bullshit. It is not relaxing and it is not a mental break. It's how much can I get done before she starts kicking her door with her feet or pulls her monitor camera down onto her head.  Better yet, the time I have no idea what she was doing and after her screams find her with the bridge of her nose scraped up and bleeding. She used to nap every 5 or 6 days so I had resigned myself that was fine but after so many days she needs a nap. Pediatricians will tell you that you cannot force the to sleep. This is quite obvious A, and B doesn't make me feel any better! It wouldn't be a huge deal if she could go without totally breaking down but 8/10 times that is not the case.

So no, I do not want to hear people who say, "Oh. My 4 yr old still takes a nap and I'm worried about kindergarten next year." Really??? You poor thing. How will your 5 year old deal with no nap? I say these mean things out of the jealousy in my heart. I want to put a sign on #1's back when we go out in  public that says, "Please excuse our behavior. One of us no longer naps. This is why there is screaming and kicking. It is not my fault. "

I should end this with the fact that she really is a smart and funny kid. She is totally smart because she knows to poop in her pull-up every stupid day. She retains so much. Grammie got her a Tinkerbell DVD for the car and one day #1 kept talking about "Biddia" and she found some jar she was playing with. I haven't watched the DVD (I know, super parenting) but I did figure out "Biddia" was probably a fairy. So we would ask her why Biddia was in the jar and she would say Daddy put her in there. Well I did watch part of the video and she was also talking about Lizzie, who is a girl. Lizzie's Dad put Vidyia in the jar and Tinkerbell has to save her. Who knew? At least "playing" and talking about Biddia gets us distracted from our tantrums. Sheesh.

I have some posts I really want to write and a DIY I did for the twins room to post as well. Maybe one day.

The Housewife

*please ignore any typos as this was an iPad post.


1 comment:

  1. I have tears rolling down my cheeks, this is so awesomely funny. I love a girl who figures out "Hey, if i just do a monster poop EVERY DAY at 'nap time,' i won't have to actually nap." The line "In this house we basically need a lot of patience and Jesus" needs to be put on T-shirts, coffee cups, mouse pads, magnets, the back of pullups, etc. I will buy the book if you ever publish one about your adventures in mothering!

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