Saturday, February 15, 2014

{cohabitation update}

I totally have SO much to update you guys on -- seriously, I do.  But today I thought I would  donate some time to new relationshipy-stuff.  Before I continue, please forgive my sudafed-nose spray-overdosing brain today.  I have some sort of gigantic sinus flare up that I am trying to kill before my trip.  I haven't had a lot of sleep, my stomach is wrecked and I just feel plain gross.

Ok.  Back to relationshipy-stuff.  (Hopefully 3 Putt won't take the ring back after he reads this. I kid.  I hope...) 3 Putt and I both knew that we would definitely move in together once we got engaged.  Although he is not technically moved in he has really been at my house ever since.  In my defense I have lived with a boy before...but holycowitwasa reallylongtimeago. It's actually been really nice -- mainly because he is so helpful and its super nice to just open the pantry and see that the garbage has been taken out or seeing him walking in the door with a pile of mail for me (I never really check the mailbox unless I'm expecting a package.).  But wow y'all -- I just kind of assumed that we already spent a lot of time together.  But I guess we really were not all up in each other like I thought. Really and truly this isn't a bad thing -- its just REALLY different.  You just get used to having shit your way all the time when you live alone.  So, yes it's a good different; however having said that I was kind of losing my mind on our snow days/me working from home days.  I'll just give a few examples of adjustment:

a) I normally go days without ever turning on the TV.   With 3 Putt I'm pretty sure that thing is always on in the background.  I had to walk out and shovel the driveway Thursday.  And tell 3 Putt it was driving me super nuts.  Because OH MY GOD ALL THE TV.

b) I'm still trying to make myself realize that we have not combined household items yet.   His clothes are here.  That's it.  It's a big adjustment to make the space.  To even think of it really.

c) I know dudes think bitches be cray but we HAVE to work on pre-bedtime straightening.  Poor guy is coming into a really anal and particular (yet not hostile) location.  But in all seriousness we cannot come downstairs in the mornings with all the pillows still on the floor that were moved off the couch during evening TV time.  

d) All good times can be spoiled by The Great Wedding Ceremony Debate.  This may be a recurring 2014 theme.

Having given these examples,  I kind of want to interview 3 Putt for a pseudo-guest post about all of the adjustments that poor guy is going through.  I really kind of pity him for having to live with me. I am not the easiest roomie.  I am sure that even though he really may be the most relaxed, gentle, kind, thoughtful guy I have ever met he has had several moments of great frustration and reminders that I can be straight batshit crazy over things like vacuum lines, the exact position of a chair in a room, and any spot that ever got on my new bedding or that may be on it in the future due to humans not being observant and preventing the dogs from doing stupid shit around said bedding.  Or the fact that I try to give a grown ass man specific linen washing instructions down to the number of times the large king size blanket should be dried.  

There are good lessons to be learned here.  I need to make a special place I can go while 3 Putt watches the TV.  He is a great roomie.   He folds laundry that I leave in the dryer.  He makes a real effort at making the bed and putting the pillows the way I like them.  He thinks every dinner I make is good or at least he doesn't say otherwise.  He always makes breakfast on the weekends and doesn't turn on the TV during this time.  If anything, this should be a lesson in what I can do for 3 Putt and help make his transition better and more comfortable.

Still,  it's not always easy to live with someone.   If anything, this relationship has taught me about deep breaths and priorities.  And I want to appreciate adjustments more -- this is the first time we will move in together.   I want to live in that moment. We won't have it again.   So remind me of that when I come downstairs tomorrow morning and the pillows are off kilter.

~the single gal~

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